self-portrait tuesday 4/12/06 angel fire

i have eaten
green chile
and red chile
(the locals call it "christmas")
each day since i have been here
in the land of enchantment.

tamales, enchiladas,
posole and beans
all smothered with the
spicy goodness of chile.

i have seen snow and rain
blow across the sangre de cristo mountains.
i have watched the sun rise and set
across the cimarron range...
the light breaking across the peaks.

and the stars.
i have almost touched them i swear.

i feel different.
calmer.
wiser even.

my beautiful friend, doris,
drove the many miles from
boulder to angel fire
bearing gifts: root beer, vanilla ice cream,
a yummy luna bar,
information on talismans, daffodils,
her wonderful spirit, and sense of adventure!

and what an adventure we had!
we drove on the high road from taos,
after eating the best pizza
in the world,
to santa fe.

my entry for april's self portrait challenge
was taken in las trampas.


i have two more days here.
my plans for today are to
eat pancakes,
get a massage at 5:00,
and eat green chile stew for dinner.
otherwise, i will go wherever
the sky tells me.

waiting loudly

along with our supporters,
we have been fighting
a good fight.

we held a rally.
we have spoken.
we have written.
we have prayed.


and until we are truly heard,
we will speak out a little more.

and write more.

and pray
more.



i left yesterday and flew west.
i am in angel fire, new mexico
population: tiny.
it is 25 miles east of taos.

one local lovingly and accurately
refferred to the stars here as
"dripping from the sky".

last night, i slept in front of a roaring fire
wrapped in a down comforter,
with a clear view of the constellations.
as i fell asleep, i knew that i was
connected with the shorties
via this vast skyscape.

i am holding them in my heart
and hoping that
we have good news for them
when we come back from
spring break.

thank you all for your support.
it is appreciated.

if you have any energy left,
please continue with the phone calls and emails.
we cannot give up this
fight to stop the injustice.

if not new song...then what?

please help our school.

we are spending the morning of our first day of spring break
in the classroom.
instead of being home and sleeping in,
the shorties of New Song, their parents,
their teachers, administrators,
and members of the community
are making phone calls,
writing letters and making our VOICES HEARD!

if you have a free moment
today.
pleasepleaseplease
email, call, or fax
(peacefully).

click on the link above and
you will find all the information you need
including a message model.

thank you for the love.

thursday love 3/30/06

read below to see the shorties' response to the article in the baltimore sun.


could you just eat them up?

March 29, 2006

Dear Ms. Neufeld,
We, the fourth-grade class at New Song Academy, would like to thank you for writing the article about our school.

After we read your words, we sat in our morning circle and reflected:
Teyona scrunched up her face as she talked about how dirty her old school was.
Derrick remembered how he sat in the overcrowded classroom of his old school, not understanding his math, and wishing his teacher had the time to help him.
Kashai wondered aloud about equal education, “If we are to be treated like the other schools, then maybe we need to not come every day, not do our homework, and mess up our reputation so that we can get more money.”
What would we do without New Song?
Where would we go after school if we didn’t have basketball and violin?
Would we be in the streets?
Baltimore City says that they can’t give us extra funding because it wouldn’t be fair to other schools. Should we feel guilty about what we have worked so hard for? As one of our seventh graders pointed out in one morning assembly, “Why should we have to pay the consequences for being poor?”
A handful of students brought up the fact that one of the reasons their parents stay in Sandtown is so they can go to New Song. “If New Song closes, then my mom will probably move to the county.”
“I always thought the mayor wanted people to stay in the city.” I said out loud.
Then, we sat in silence, imagining “us” without each other.

We don’t know if we will continue, as a family, until we graduate from New Song. But we know that we will try our best to get there, together. Thank you for being part of that effort.

Respectfully,
Asaan Glover
Kashai Galloway
Demond Brown
Brooke Turner
Eric Miller
Daniel Whitehead
Antonio Sims
Tyron Edmonds
Daisha Faison
Tyrone DeShields
Teyona Griffith
Derrick Moore
Malika Brookes
Jaz’mon Churchill
Kathleen McCullough

click it!

check out the new song academy site on my link list (to the right).
this will help keep you updated on meetings, letters, and other stuff.
feel free to comment, write about calls you made or letters you wrote.

let your voice be heard!

and again,
thank you all.

peace.

hittin' the fan

i was told once, by a very wise professor, to
not be afraid to stir things up
when it comes to education and
advocating for children.
as i sat
with my finger hovering over
the "enter" key on my laptop
contemplating whether or not
to "send" the words below,
i thought of her.
i held my breath and
did it.

thank you, doug, for the ammunition.



email correspondence:

Dear Mr. Hettleman,

While New Song may have converted to a public school from private, the fact is that BCPSS accepted the model and has never fully funded what they accepted.

As for treating New Song differently than other schools, this is exactly the point, we want to be treated just the same as other schools. Actually, we want to be treated worse than one of the schools. That would be School for the Arts. How much do they get, exactly, per pupil? Is it true that they get one million dollars over the per student allocation? We have no idea how much over the standard per pupil schools like Poly, City or Western, let alone Roland Park, get .
Why is it when we are asked to be equal it’s equal to the lowest common denominator and not the schools that are doing well?

As for the “can’t find the money"... this argument doesn’t hold water when you look at the number of dollars wasted each year on over staffing North Avenue and failures like the Studio curriculum. ..or the number of very highly paid people from the Fund for Educational Excellence (where Bonnie used to work) who are now on the systems budget. If the system cannot find funding/support for success that what is left? Supporting and finding failure.

I appreciate you reading this response. You are the only person who has taken the time to respond to these concerns that weigh so heavily on my mind as I face the worried faces of the community of Sandtown each morning.

Thank you - Kathleen McCullough


In a message dated 3/27/06 6:25:31 AM, khettleman@comcast.net writes:


Thank you for your email. I appreciate the good work done by the New Song
> community, but the bottom line is that the school system does not have the
> funds to replace funding from private donors and foundations. If I recall
> correctly, New Song was strictly a private school until it turned to BCPSS
> for funding as a "New School." We certainly can't treat New Song differently
> than other schools.
>
> Moreover I believe that despite your good intentions, the New Song community
> is doing all the schools a disservice by placing the blame on BCPSS, rather
> than the inadequate funding that affects all schools.
>
> Thank you again for your interest.

----- Original Message -----
From: Vwsamiam@aol.com
To: khettleman@comcast.net
Sent: Sunday, March 26, 2006 9:14 PM
Subject: school in danger of closing

Dear Mr. Hettleman,

If BCPSS can not sustain success, then their only purpose is to sustain failure. Where is the hope for our children? Fund New Song Academy!

Thank you for your consideration,
Kathleen McCullough

we will be heard

click here to keep updated on what is going on with our school.

this will let you know what actions we are taking and how you can help.

thank you to everyone who has helped and has been heard.

furthermore, If anyone receives a reply from a BCPSS board member (like joy and i did), please consider using the following as a response.

We need $7,500. Our school has assumed much of the responsibility that the BCPSS central office typically assumes and yet, we receive no compensation for our efforts. We are asking that the 59% of the System's per pupil expenditure be allocated to New Song and that 41% be retained for Central Office purposes. Currently, we receive 41% and Central Office retains 59%. This is both a reasonable and feasible request. Certainly, BCPSS hopes that every school would be able to meet all the standards set forth in the Master Plan and therefore become eligible for a similar funding allocation. It would make your jobs far easier if you didn't have to do the work that schools should be capable of doing for themselves.

We are not "blaming" anyone. We are just stating the facts and advocating for the students

let 'em have it!

Dear Friends,

In an effort to put pressure on the mayor and the school board for adequate funding, we are asking that you send the following statement:

"If BCPSS can not sustain success, then their only purpose is to sustain failure. Where is the hope for our children? Fund New Song Academy!"

Please send to:

Mayor Martin O'Malley mayor@baltimorecity.gov
Anirban Basu abasu@sagepolicy.com
James W. Campbell jcamp@jhu.edu
Douglas R. Kington doug@kingtoncommercial.com
Kalman R. Hettleman khettleman@comcast.net
George M. VanHook, Sr gvanhook@dhr.state.md.us

Diane L. Bell fax number: 410.783.0526

also,
check out the article about out school in the baltimore sun.
read it.
get angry about it.
let your voice be heard for
all children
who are
left behind.

thursday love

i love my shorties.
nuff said.
and that is mainly what this blog is about.
but in honor of 'things i love thursdays,
i would like to say that one of the
things i LOVELOVELOVE,
is my shorties' writing.
the following is a short story (no pun intended)
written by one of my brilliant, sweet, babies.

I was born in 1996 at University Hospital. I live in the community of Sandtown.
Sandtown is a great place but if people would stop killing and selling drugs it would be a better place.
I have been going to [Sandtown Academy] all my life. I even went to the pre-school!
Almost everybody who lives in Sandtown knows each other. Every weekend, almost every kid in the neighborhood plays football, “Catch One, Catch All”, or they just walk around. When you put them together, most of the people in Sandtown make one, big, happy person. The rest of the people make a grumpy person.
When someone dies, that everyone knows, they all go to the funeral.
I can’t even look at the news because most of the bad things that go on, happen in Sandtown.
I have experienced the sadness of a lot of killing. What people are not understanding is that the people they kill are really their brothers and sisters. And the other thing that people don’t get is that the bad drugs they are selling are also killing, or hurting, people. I just wish there weren’t any drug dealers and gangs.
On March 26, 2005, my brother, Jordan, was born. I want the best for my brother. I want him to be able to go outside and play without getting shot or seeing gangsters or drug dealers. I want my brother to go to school and stay in school. I want him to live a good life.
My teacher always tells me that I am going to be the mayor one day. Maybe I will. And then, maybe I can make the change that is necessary.


note: watch out for this shortie. he will be our first african-american president, unless someone older takes the job first!

self-portrait tuesday 3/21/06: daily grind

it is my morning ritual.
grind.
pack.
twist.
and wait.

it is my morning treat.
breathing in the nutty perfume
of the steamed rice milk
and deep, rich espresso.
breathing deeply
visualizing the day ahead.

march challenge

the luck of the irish...

each day this week, ms. gwynn has served up
bacon, eggs, pop tarts, french toast, sausage, fruit, yogurt and bagels.

it is the last day of state testing
for the shorties.
the shorties have cried and cheered,
huffed and puffed.
they have sat through
two-hour sessions each day.
they have written,
and calculated.
chewing on their pencils,
they have pulled on their
knowledge of all
that they have learned.

it is the last day of state testing
for me.
i have cried and cheered.
i have sharpened pencils
and rubbed shoulders.
i have misted their tired
faces with cold water.
i have given out bagfuls of
butterscotch and lemon candy,
bubble gum and smarties.
i have explored with them and have
taught them all i could
in seven months.

we are all being graded.
they are being graded to pass.
i am being graded to ensure my future employment.

the state looks at these paper pictures
scribbled with knowledge and fear and fatigue
and get their numbers.
and these numbers are what they see.
unfortunaltely, for them,
they don't see the smiles or recieve the hugs.
they don't get to see the writing journals packed with outrageously creative stories and poems.
the models built to explain ten year-olds' theories are lost to their paper-only assessment.
lead levels don't matter.
lack of sleep due to noisy neighbors are not factored in.
getting hollered at before you walk to school has to be forgotten.

so here they sit. fueled up.
taking the last few hours of this morning
to give it all that they've got.

next week is going to be one long party.

self-portrait tuesday 3/14/06: seasons

it is almost as if, with each season,
we start with a clean slate.

i was inspired, by the recent lovely weather,
to show measurement in time
throughout seasons.

a spring field trip,
summer in the outerbanks,
pretending to be "ms. kataluna" for halloween,
and winter camping with friends.

being a teacher,
i still get excited
listening to the radio
for school closings after
a winter storm.
and i love walking the city streets
with the shorties,
looking for signs of new life in march.
the shorties and i sweat as we
walk the few blocks to
mr. benny's snowcone stand
on hot summer afternoons.
scooping out pumpkins,
writing scary stories,
and eating handfuls of candy corn
are the best part of autumn.

what is your favorite season?

thursday love 3/9/06

my man.
mr. paul.

patient beyond words.
thoughtful.
real.

i don't know what i did...
but i'm glad.

promises, promises

my cute little baby-bunny shortie comes to
me after school,
"ms. k, i am sad.
i am sad because everyone is
saying i like a boy that is
just a friend."

"i would hope that all boys are
only your friends" i want to say.

sigh.

"let's talk."

we sit.

"this is going to happen a lot.
starting now. and it will happen even
when you are a grownup."

"that is a long time, ms. k."

"well, until then, you have
to just smile."

"but i feel mad," she explained
to me-who-is-clearly-not-understanding.

"yes...but they are trying to make you mad.
if you smile, it will catch them off guard
and they won't know how to react!"

i wanted to tell her to
reveal who THEY like.
or say, "how can i like him when
i saw you writing his name all over
your notebook yesterday?"

but she will learn that game soon enough.
she will only be a fourth grader for
another five months...and then
the angelic baby-bunny shortie
will become a toughie-shortie.

when i bring it up in class,
they promise me that they
will never become an
attitude-filled middle schooler....
they will always take care of each other.

we pinkie-swear and lick the icing off of
baby-bunny shortie's birthday cupcakes.

self-portrait tuesday 3/7/06: true colors over time

i am a color fiend.
i am somewhat of a slacker
this week, too,
as i resorted to using
the different colors of
my hair over the last few years
to show the passing of time.

over the last ten years i have had
long, blonde-streaked hair,
long pitch-black hair,
long red hair,
short red hair with blonde streaks,
and navy-streaked, pulled back into twists.
i have had turquoise/blonde striped chunks,
a thick navy stripe,
and finally,
fuschia and blonde fusion.

maybe it is a sickness
connected to my
shoe obsession?
maybe i am trying to
hold onto my youth?
(and is THAT so wrong?)
maybe i am just
trying to be perceived
as more
kickass
than i really am?

whothehellknows.

i am thinking short and bleached for summer...

all thanks to sarah, who made me a believer in bleach.

i am grateful...

for time to reflect.

for friends who make that possible.

for the e-ticket to new mexico that i received this morning.

for support and encouragement.

for medical donations from strangers to cover what my insurance does not.

for the whatever-it-is that is inspiring my 11 year-old mentee to try to stay out of trouble.

for temranillo (a grape varietal that makes yummmmmmmmmy wine).

for the love and patience that my husband is full of. that fact that he puts up with me makes my draw drop sometimes.

for carribean-jerk chicken wings delivered to my house.

for joe-joe ginger sandwich-creme cookies from trader joes

for the shorties. always for the shorties. for their safety, well-being, and their unconditional adoration. it rocks my world.

for family.

for friends. (who are also family)

and love. love. love.

thursday love 3/2/06

i heart t-bone and michael.

they moved away from baltimore
seven years ago
now they live in
portland, oregon (far away!)
so it is a giant treat when
they come home to visit!
they spent almost a week
with us and we:
drank coffee
and talked all morning
and ate
and talked all afternoon
and drank wine
and were loud enough to make the neighbor bang on the wall
and talked late into the night
and ate
and went to a museum
and talked while we walked
and ate some more
and drank some more.

oh. and we laughed so
much that my sides are still bruised
and they left a week ago!

so i dedicate this thursday post-o-love
to those two cutie pah-tootie pies
that i miss way muchly.

self-portrait tuesday 2/28/06 accountability

nothing is working.

whenever i want something badly enough
i work my tail off until i achieve my goal.
only, this time, i am not
in charge.

every month
i have come to
expect the
same response:
"we are sorry.
the treatment didn't work.
call us on the first day
of your next cycle."

and i do.
and it fails.

if you had told me years ago,
during the 13 year span
that i was on the pill,
that i would be desperately
trying to
conceive,
i would have laughed
in your face.

now, as we are approaching
the second to the last
(and uninsured)
step of infertility treatments,
i am angry at myself that i waited so long.
i am pissed that my eggs are old.
i want to kick somebody's ass...but the only one
i can hold accountable, is me.

no child left a dime

many people have asked
how they can help.
my heart is full from the kindness
that has poured forth towards
the well-being of my shorties
and the continuation of our school.

the thought of our school system
receiving letters from around the
country is crazygood.
a few of you have written letters and
i thankyouthankyouthankyou.
your thoughtfulness blows me away
in this day and age.

i am posting this
so that if you feel you want to write
to our school system and
tell them that you think
our schools need more funding, you can.
living in the neighborhood with the highest
murder-rate in baltimore city,
these children are, in fact, being
left behind.
our children are
too familiar with
having things taken away.
plain fact:
poor neighborhoods have poor schools.
and they don't fight for what they
don't think they deserve.
we want to change that.
if you are tired of our children
being forgotten and the right
to an EQUAL education for our
city schools being a motto instead of
a reality,
then write.

baltimore city has a motto: "believe."
remind them to believe in our schools.

and then, write to your local school system
and remind them to do the same thing.

email me: VWSamIam@aol.com
and i will give you all the addresses
and other information that you may need.

on this friday, i am grateful...

for bleach and pink hair dye.

a week break. even though i miss the shorties, we all needed this break (right emily?)

for long afternoon naps.

that we got to spend some quality time with our friends, tony and michael. they live in portland now and were visiting us this past week. it was sad when they left...

for our neighbors understanding when we kept them awake at 1 a.m. because we were spending quality time with above-mentioned guests.

for the american visionary arts museum. it is considered one of the top five best museums in the country. baltimore rocks, oh yes, it does!

that my physical went well. i was told that i didn't need to come back for another three years! i am feelin' healthy!

for great local theatre companies. we went to see "the cripple of innishman" last night.

for good friends. i cannot say this enough. you know who you are. you know i love you!

for the ability to embrace each "season" in my life...although sometimes it is very hard to remember to do this.

for guiness and shepard's pie. YUM!

for lemon poppyseed scones and whole wheat pizza dough from trader joe's.

for guacamole. made tableside. then scooped up with plantain chips. ooooooh yeah...life is good.

that burt's bees makes a coconut foot creme. mmmmm hmmmm...that is what i said.

for love.

for love.

for love.

things i love 2/23/06

this is the last meal i had with the shorties
before we went on our break.
last week, on fun friday,
we tore the soft,
spongy goodness into
sweet, sticky pieces
and savored each
mouthful.
we licked our fingers and
talked about how
krispy kreme donuts
are one of the best
food in the world.
we stared longingly
at the empty boxes and
wished they would magically
be full again.

sigh.

even the box is
retro-liscious.

i heart these
so much.




check out what joy loves!

SPT 2/21/06: the good, the bad, and the shoes

"the LAST thing i need is
another pair of maryjanes," i said
to my cousin as i slipped on
the cutest black mesh ballet-looking maryjanes.
i also tried on (and bought) these and these.

i arrived home,
and went to my closet to
put my treasures away.
i opened the door
and stared blankly
at the lack of space for
the new additions.
it was then that i
realized that
this obsession with footwear
would have to be the subject
of my next post for
february's challenge.

the next day,
i decided to line up
each pair in our hallway.
i dusted off my
ten-year-old dr. martens
and placed them next to the
6 other pair of boots.
i counted 13 pairs of sandals,
8 various types of red shoes,
4 blue,
2 purple,
1 pink,
22 black,
18 different types of maryjanes,
6 pairs of comfy clogs,

60 pairs of shoes, total.
not including the 9 pairs of flip-flops
and 2 slippers.

"is this so wrong?" i thought
as i tried on my wedding shoes and
tiptoes through my memories,
each shoe reminding me
of a vacation,
or girls-day,
or a special someone who
gifted a pair to me.

paul walked down the
hall of shame
and teased,
"if i lined up all of my shoes
heel-to-toe,
they wouldn't even make it halfway
down this hallway."

he is right.

i took photos while
friends stopped in and
gasped, marveled and
shook their heads.

packing them back into
their little boxes took time.
i stashed away my gluttony
and closed the door,
once again in the closet.

grateful friday

inspired by michelle.

i am grateful ...

for the 28 plus hugs i get each day.

that my students parents will fight to keep our school.

that my students want to fight to keep our school.

for my shorties.

for my colleagues who really do believe that children come first.

for the smuggled peanut butter from the cafeteria to make bird-feeders.

for pink champagne after one of the longest day that i thought i could ever endure.

that my husband made the cornbread that i thought i had to come home and make.

for handmade valentines.

for the extended deadline to get report cards done.

for all of the people who have offered to help fight for what all children everywhere deserve.

for this fire that feeds my soul everytime i think about the injustice that my children face everyday.

for all of the love of my family and friends.

for life.

"what do you mean you won't be home tonight?"

"it's valentine's day!"
my husband pleaded.

yesterday morning,
the shorties and i
scarfed up some
heart-shaped pancakes.
(what better way to learn fractions?)

during my planning period,
on my maple-syrup-high,
i sat down to compose my
letter to our school board.
"dear jerkees..."

the shorties returned and
wrote their final drafts for the
letters that they are sending.
then...
after our valentine deliveries
and mouthfuls of chocolate,
the school day ended.
i gathered the many
heart-shaped boxes,
stuffed animals,
roses and balloons and,
along with my colleagues
raced to the board meeting.

all of our teachers were there.
our reading specialist, cafeteria manager,
social worker/counselor,
receptionist/school protector,
and HR manager, were there, too.

when our chosen teacher
went up to speak,
he simply said that we
need the funding to have a
full teaching staff.
"we wrote letters and would
appreciate it if you could read them."
he explained that we are a
small school, "one teacher per grade."

we walked up and handed our letters to each board member.
each of us had letters to deliver.
we piled them on
and peacefully left.

our words, our love, our hearts
were in those envelopes.
ripped open, i hope they released
some goodness into the hearts of their readers.

tomorrow, the shorties send theirs.

self-portrait tuesday 2/14/06: acceptance

february's challenge: "all of me"... embrace your mistakes, love the ugly bits.

in honor of the holiday o'love,
i am going to look on the
sweet side of what i usually
beat myself up over.

sometimes...ok, mostly,
i say the most innappropriate things.
but i embrace this because
it shows that i am passionate
and show my true self.

i talk too much.
all of my report cards
from elementary school say,
"kathleen talks too much during lessons"
"kathleen needs to focus more on her
learning and not on socializing"
i talk when i am nervous.
i talk when i am excited.
but, this is cool cuz
i meet a lot of people this way.
of course they probably think i am a nerd.
(joy, i was inspired by you to use that word)

my room is a mess.
instead of taking a few seconds
to hang up my clothes,
i throw them on our hope-chest
until the pile grows enormously.
but this is okay because
that is what saturday mornings are for.

i will let laundry sit for days
in a basket before i
fold it.
um...er...
i wish i could find something to love
about this.
but i can't.

i never write lesson plans.
this is crazy, i know.
but i love that i can be
spontaneous and work with
what the moment gives me.
even when i plan...it never goes
the way i thought it would anyway.
(for the record. i DO know WHAT i am going
to be teaching...just not always how
i am going to go about it...)

i don't plan my time wisely.
it is hard for me to focus on a task
and finish it without being distracted
by a million other things during the process.
(can you say ADD?)
i embrace this because it takes talent
to multi-task (which is what i'll call it).

i wait until the last minute to do everything.
this is good because it thrills me
to get it done and do well.
i work better under pressure.
i used to type all of my college papers
the night before they were due.
it was a challenge to me to see if i could
still get an A.

so i procrastinate.
and i can't shut my pie-hole when i need to.
and i can't sit still for long.

but i enjoy my free-time to the max.
and my voice is heard.
and i am adventurous.

love me or leave me.
i am not going to change now.

snow day!

emily and i spent our snow day
drafting a letter to the
ceo of our board of ed.
to try and save our school.

if not our school, then what?

what will happen to our children?

short-tea wisdom

"it's not life that matters; it's the courage that we bring to it". - printed on my yogi tea bag


when i told the shorties
during our morning circle
that our school is in danger of closing
they got mad.

they got angry just
as their parents had
the night before
at the parent meeting
where our principal informed
them that because
of inadequate funding
we might be forced to close.

"if not our school, then WHAT?"
she has asked our school system
repeatedly.

our school is not perfect.
but we advocate for what is
best for our children.
period.

we make sure that they
know how special they are
through much love,
patience,
understanding,
encouragement,
and alwaysalwaysalways
having their back.

oh.
and then,
after that,
we teach them.
we encourage them to
embrace gaining as much
knowledge as they can stand.
encourage them to share thier
thinking and be proud of
the struggle and for
reaching the summit
of understanding.

it makes me angrier
than i have ever been in my life
to think that our doors could be locked
and our windows dark.

but it won't happen without a fight.
my shorties are mailing their letters tomorrow.
our staff is showing up at the board meeting
on tuesday with our letters in hand,
and parents by our side.

our voices WILL BE HEARD.

all we wanted was to have enough.
the bare minimum.
and they said no.
so now, the fight is not just for us,
but will become a city-wide fight
for what every child in this
corrupt school system deserves:
an education that is equal to all other
counties in our state. in our nation.

with their NO,
they have opened the
biggest can o'
we-have-kept-quiet-long-enough-and-have-watched-our-children-be-ignored-LONG-ENOUGH

one shortie asked me,
"ms. k., are other schools going to fight, too?"
"we are going to ask them to," i responded.
"when our parents go to the person in charge, can we go too?"
"you can do anything you want. anything." i stated.

and they can.
the shorties are gonna rock our city.
just watch 'em.




i teach with emily. read her thoughts about this here.

one o' my peeps

hey ya'll.
my friend has
finally decided to start
a blog, too!

she and i work together.
she is an amazing
teacher, writer, inspiration.
i am in awe of her talents.

check out her words here
and hear about her shorties.
(she teaches 5/6th grade girls)

also. she is going to kill me
for posting this! hee!

self-portrait tuesday 2/6/06: all of me

selfportraittuesday.blogspot.com/

when i was in sixth grade
my friend's older sister,
who was a cheerleader,
told me that i should
consider having my jaw broken
so that my chin didn't stick out
so much.

later, in high school,
i was teased about it
and made to feel like a
freak.

when i was in my twenties,
someone told me that i
was beautiful when one looked
at me from the front
but from the side
i wasn't.

over the years i have thrown
so many pictures away
because of my profile.

not until my mid-thirties
did i embraced my
moon-shaped face.

now, close to forty
i can't believe i didn't
just hold my chin up high
and laugh at them
for their shallowness.

more than words

my shorties have always drawn me pictures.
even when they weren't my shorties,
in second grade,
they would cram a picture
into my hand
as they passed me in the hallway.
"i drew this for you,"
they would croon
as they threw their arms around my waist.

now, they draw AND write.
here is one that was drawn
by a shortie that i swear
is a true-life angel.

read it and weep.

to view LARGER

we take care of each other - part 2

sometimes the shorties forget our
only classroom rule:
"we take care of each other.
no exceptions. period."

it is understandable.
i mean, after all,
they ARE only 10.

in our morning circle today,
i asked them to share
one adjective
that revealed how they felt
at that moment.

happy,
tired,
broken,
(broken? did my shortie just say broken?
can you just rip my heart out, too?)
energized,
miserable,
bored,
sad,
and hopeful
were some of
the words i heard.

when asked what they noticed,
one shortie replied,
"we all feel differently."
another,
"some of us feel good
and some of us feel
rotten."

so i closed my eyes,
sighed deeply and said
that, for some of the kids in
our school, being at home can
really stink.
parents yell, curse and
beat their children.
outside, guns are shot,
dealers deal their
death sentences and
people are involved in their
own wars.

when i opened my eyes,
i looked around.
i looked into the knowing eyes of
some of my shorties and knew that
i had connected.

"can you imagine how these
children must feel when
they come to school?" i asked,
"and someone teases them,
or makes fun of them?"
i explained
that this means
that not only is their
home-life hurtful,
but coming to school
is painful, too.
"wouldn't it be nice if we
made our classroom a
safe place?
a place where we
feel accepted and loved?"
i offered.

one child said,
"sometimes, people are mean
to you because they are mad or sad."
"and then we are mean back to them,"
said another.

then the tears started.
tears of remorse for being
mean to a friend,
tears of release for
acknowledgement of
pain,
tears for seeing others' tears.

we all had a good cry.

my tears came when one of my
angels said,
"i want to give ms. kathleen kudos."
i looked up in surprise.
"because she always manages to
touch our hearts."

seriously.
a ten year old said that.
to me.

i am hopeful for our future.
i am touched beyond belief.

SPT 1/31/06: charles

my dad was married five times.
he had five children:
tom (first wife)
chuck and karen (wife #2)
rikk and me (#3)
i am the youngest of my siblings.
(i didn't meet karen until i was 11;
tom 19; and chuck 21)
i was the only one of the five
to live with my dad throughout my
childhood.

yeah...my dad had his issues.
he struggled with alcoholism,
self-confidence and loneliness.
but one thing was constant.
he adored me.
and i knew it.

he came to every audition,
every concert,
every play.
i was, truly, the apple of his eye.

i never took advantage of it.
i was even sometimes terrified
that i had ruined everything
and had lost his trust forever.

but he always came through.

i could do nothing to make
him not believe in me.
and, trust me,
his faith was challenged more
than a few times.

he died when i was 21.
18 years ago and i still
miss him
terribly.

i often wish he could see me now.
wish he could meet paul
and know that i have a
peaceful life.
i would love to hang out with him
as an adult and
hear his memories
and just
chill together.


(this is my dad sometime in the late 40s)

january's challenge: personal history

haiku #1

valentine's day is coming.
it is my favorite holiday
as i get to promote lovelovelove.

saying that, i wrote two haikus today.

a kiss on your cheek
my stomache flutters as you
grin and do the same



i will always love
the way you make butterflies
swirl in my stomache

E,G,B,D,F

today was recital day.
the shorties put on their sunday digs and
wowed the whole school
with their courage and
talent.

my heart almost burst.
they rock.
they are truly stellar.

self-portrait tuesday 1/24/06: change

self portrait tuesday january challenge: personal history

the one artifact i have from my childhood,
besides the few pictures that i have hijacked
along the way,
is made from clay.

you know what i am talking about.
you made one, too, right?



i sometimes hold it and run my fingers over the
lines in my smaller-younger-hand.
then i compare the contrast of my current-hand.
i have many more
lines
now.

it is amazing to me that my fingerprints
are the same as when i was this
six-year-old self.

i have shown the shorties this
piece of my herstory
to prove that i was,
in fact,
a kid
once.

what i don't
tell them is
that i
still
am.

flickr photos