no picnic

"dear ms. k."
the email read,
"i miss you.
how is the baby doing?
i thought you said we were your children.
you said we were family.
love, na-na."

how do tell a third grader,
who has abandonment issues,
that i am not leaving her forever?
how do i tell a child who
i have dearly loved since i
first saw her beautiful, smarmy grin
five years ago,
that i will always be in her life?

last week was hard.
i wanted to drive to the school
and tell them one more time
how proud i am of them.
i wanted to go read their writing and
be amazed at their creativity.
i wanted to make sure i have hugged
each one of them enough to last until
i come back to visit.
and then,
start all over again.

sigh.

this is harder than i thought it would be.